A lot of things run through my mind lately. Some are pleasant to think about but some are not. Most of the time, my mind just wanders off in no direction , just like a kite with broken strings. Sometimes I just got myself thinking about my life.I'm not sure how long I can go on like this.It is eating me up slowly. Even though  I keep on telling myself everything is not that bad but most of the times the world is spinning around me. At times I feel like my heart is shattered into tiny pieces and when I try to patch things up, some pieces seem to go missing. There are times when I can even hear my own heart beating when I'm all alone in the house. And sometimes when I place my hand on my chest, I cannot feel  my heart beating at all like it is not there anymore. I am not depressed, just sad, lonely and unhappy. Like the old French expression 'les papillions noir'. This, I would say, perfectly and poetically describes the melancholic thoughts and feelings that flutter through the body and mind when we experience sadness.. 

naesnest.me