THAT WAS NEITHER THE FIRST NOR THE SECOND TIME I WENT THROUGH IT. EXPERIENCING IT OVER  AND  OVER AGAIN ALWAYS LEFT ME CRYING FOR HOURS.

thecitymouse.net

Engkaukah itu,

Yang kuhamburkan, 

Tika dibalut kesepian, 

Oleh rasa keasingan dan kehampaan.

Engkaukah itu,

Yang menyahut panggilan sayu,

Menerpa, merempuh ombak dadaku,

Dalam kesepian, kegelapan diri,

Menjanjikan perpisahan di esok hari.

Engkaukah itu, 

yang akan menyusuriku,

Tika aku berlalu,

Meninggalkan daerah kesayanganku,

Gelak ketawa dan sendaku, 

Kini kan jadi kelabu.

Iringilah daku,

Kerana engkaulah yang lebih memungkinkan perasaan,

Menyatakan kesedihan,

Duhai sang airmata ku.....

I should have just said this right into her face. I regretted simply leaving the office without saying things that were building blocks in my head. When I played back the meeting in my head I felt so angry with myself for not spilling things out. These are what I should have said..
When your boss is out of the meeting, please tell him about this visit. Tell him that a woman is asking for the right way to tell a child what she was told months ago..(yes..when they met you) were only lies. Lies told by an adult who claimed that he was one of the big shots there. Do remind him not to make anymore promises that he cannot keep. And, please also remember to ask him for a way to mend this child's broken heart.

When I left the building, it seemed like all hopes were gone. Along suggested we go shopping but I was not in the mood anymore. I just wanted to get home. All the way, I kept on asking myself what would be the best way to explain things to Adik. I could already picture her in disappointment, frustration and tears..

Months later, when I could finally come to terms with what was happening, I went home after work feeling better. While driving, I kept on telling myself, ' You must accept this with an open heart  and mind. The right word is Redha. Accept Qada and Qadar. We plan with big hopes but Allah swt plans with love. So, no questions asked. Much to my surprise, on that day, again I experienced an extraordinary event manifesting divine intervention in human affairs. Allahuakbar! What do you know! I just could not believe my eyes when I saw it in the mail box ! I was so happy that l cried for hours! Syukur Alhamdulillah.. thank you Allah .. thank you for answering my prayer..

flickr.com

Sometimes Allah takes away the sun,

and replaces it with a stormy weather,

You cry your heart out,

Groping your way through,

Looking for some lights,

Only to realise that, verily

Allah wants to provide you with a better shelter.